Reality Bites :)

As Salam,

Sudah lama membiarkan blog 'berhabuk', tidak diupdate..and now, I am back with stories :)

Saya sudah selamat melahirkan anak ketiga, alhamdulillah..
Saya sudah selamat menghabiskan pantang di rumah sendiri (with lots of adventures,), alhamdulillah..

Saya sudah kembali semula berkerja di office...arrrgghhhh...

Dengan izinNya saya akan kongsi all the above experiences in this blog.. :)

The Epilog of My Temporary Maid Story...

Plan nya nak return this temporary maid hari ni lepas habis check up with gynae..tapi, hubby kata lepas berbuka pulak sebab the agent takde kat rumah dia (byk betul alasan..). aku tak cakap lagi kat maid ni yang we want to return her to the agent today..nak cakap on the last minute..

Upon completed my check up, aku balik rumah. My niece tgh buat kerja in her room and I did not bring the house keys with me..aku tekan bell rumah..aku dengar orang bukan pintu, it was my niece. Masuk rumah, aku tanya la mane pergi nye si bibik tu. My niece cakap dia pegi lap tingkap and pintu kat atas..Dah takde kerja lain lah tu..then my niece cakap, dia kata sunyi takde budak-budak..

Cesss, ade budak-budak kat rumah pun bukan nye kau nak jaga..aku membebel sendiri..

Aku bukak fridge, tgk cheesecake punye pan dah kosong..aik, sape pulak lah yang makan..sebab semua orang puasa kat rumah ni except si bibik. Tapi, aku tanya my niece and hubby dulu..kot-kot lah diaorg yang makan time sahur and tak keluar kan bekas yang kosong tu.

Nak tau sape yang makan? Rupa-rupanye si bibik ni dah habiskan. Then, dengan elegant nya meninggalkan bekas kosong tu dalam fridge..Amboi, kenyang perut suka hati betul ye..segala makanan dirembat nya..even cekodok anak-anak aku pun dia belasah tanpa segan silu..ishk.. tapi, aku bukan marah sebab dia makan..menjadi kemarahan ialah dah makan, tak tau nak basuh ke kemas ke ape ke..ishk..memang mengundang kemarahan betul lah..dah lah tak puasa..

Bila si bibik ni masuk kitchen, aku pun tegur lah dia..kenapa tak kemas bekas yang dia dah makan. Tinggal kan bekas dah kosong dalam fridge. Standard jawapan, “SAYA NGAK TAU”..aku memang dah cukup bosan dengan jawapan ni dari dia sebab rasenye dah berbuih mulut ni remind her to ask around kalau tak tahu…dan bermula lah aku punye khutbah..tak pernah rasenye aku berkhutbah dgn beremosi dgn bibik-bibik aku sebelum ni..this is the first..

Then, aku cakap kat dia yang aku akan beritahu ape yang terjadi dalam rumah nie kat agent dia…

Around 12.30, aku keluar nak pick up Adam from school, bring together Layla with me. Pesan dekat my niece to watch over the bibik as dia ade tanya aku mana nak naik kereta sewa kat sini..huhuhu..that one of the signs tuk orang nak lari..

Aku drive keluar, the bibik pun lari in broad daylight..

Aku malas dah nak fikir pasal dia. Kurang serabut kepala. How ironic is that..

Alhamdulillah dia takde curi atau bawak ape2 barang from our house. The kids are safely with us…

Banyak benda yang dia dah buat, yang malas aku nak cerita kat sini..memang fail lah buat kerja rumah, apa tah lagi menjaga budak-budak…dengan attitude problem dia lagi..

Segala nya bagai di susun oleh Tuhan..

Banyak petunjuk yang diberikan..Terima kasih ya Tuhan kerana meringankan beban hambaMu ini..

Sesungguhnya Engkau Maha Pengasih & Penyayang

Its scary how time flies sooo fast..today dah 15 Ramadhan..

Pagi-pagi dah dengar lagu raya..Dah nak raya!

And nak kena beranak lepas raya..hahahha..Takut nye..

We have decided to return our temporary maid ASAP.

Nak return terus last nite, but the agent buat macam2 alasan..

Takde kat rumah lah..nak pegi tido kat rumah makcik kat damansara lah..

At last, the agent terus terang cakap yang her husband the suka the maid ade kat rumah dia..dang!

This is the worst maid we ever encounter..

Tak pandai buat kerja, kita ajar..tak pandai lagi..sabar, kita ajar lagi..

Tak nak pulak ikut arahan, then bila org tanya balik, dia marah or tengking kita..pulak dah...

Kata muslim, tapi selamba tak pose and makan depan2 orang..

Tak bole nak fikir buat kerja apa..semua nak kena beritahu..

Kalau tak beritahu nak buat ape..bole dia duduk melanguk kat dalam bilik sorang-sorang..

Ishk, ape pun tak boleh lah..kerja rumah tak bole buat, jaga budak-budak lagi tak boleh harap..

Suruh pegi cuci tangan Layla lepas makan, muka Layla yg comot dgn sisa makanan tak dibersihkan skali..adoi, sakit kepala..

Sebelum ni aku ade bibik yang memang tak pernah masuk Malaysia, takde experience..aku ajar semua benda dari A-Z for kerja-kerja rumah, macam mana jaga anak-anak, how to manage time, how to read the clock correctly, macam mana nak pakai sitting toilet, flush the toilet, even to the extend of pakai menses pad tu..ha, tu memang haru betul! Tapi aku fikir diaorg takde benda-benda nie kat kampung..

Time tu aku tengah third trimester pregnant with..penat lelah aku tahankan, menggunung kesabaran, Tuhan je lah yang tahu..memikirkan supaya dia boleh buat kerja bebetul..Alhamdulillah, bole diharap menjaga anak-anak and buat kerja rumah..

Tapi, this time.. Bole meroyan sebelum beranak..

Kejadian last night was the highlight of her stay aku rase lah..

Nak tau ape bibik ni dah buat?

Waktu orang berbuka..dia tak tahu nak buat ape..tak pegi solat maghrib..dok asyik bukak air kat sink ntah basuh ape..then amik kain, lap tabletop aku..itu lah yang diulang-ulang nye..aku nie dok sibuk melayan Layla, Adam and hubby yang berbuka..tak menang tangan..diri sendiri penat and lapar dah tak peduli dah..

Kesian tengok aku, hubby offer untuk suapkan Layla..aku melayan Adam sambil makan..

Then, budak-budak dah settle, suruh the kids main toys dulu sebab Abah and Ibu nak makan kejap..the maid, still kat dapur buat the same repeatitive work..haiiii..

As usual, Layla akan mengacau time makan. My hubby pun panggil lah si bibik ni minta tolong jaga kan Layla and layan dia main while kitaorang makan kejap..

Layla tak nak, menangis, and aku decided letak Layla dalam baby chair and layan dia sambil makan..

Aku suruh lah si bibik ni pegi mandi, dari takde buat ape yang berfaedah pun aku tengok..

Then dia habis mandi, keluar bilik dengan tersengih-sengih..

Pakai BAJU TIDUR knee length yang JARANG..

Macam nak pengsan hubby and aku tengok..

Hubby terus stop makan, basuh tangan and amik wudhu and pegi solat maghrib..

before solat my hubby cakap..”Yang, can you please talk to her, now!”

Wakakaka..aku nak ketawa..marah pun ade..

Aku masuk dapur, letak pinggan dalam sinki and basuh tangan

“Bibik mari sini kejap, saya nak cakap .. “ Aku masuk bilik dia and dia ikut sekali..

“Saya nak cakap dengan bibik ni sebagai seorang perempuan, bukan majikan…” maka start lah aku nye lecture…

Aku bagi dia sekolah cukup-cukup pasal perangai dia yang tak tahu malu tu..

Aku ade cakap kat dia..Even dalam rumah aku ni, ade suami aku je..pernah ke dia nampak aku pakai baju macam tu..jarang, pendek..

Ishk, mane lah pegi perasaan malu orang macam ni..

Dah tua babe, umur kata 42yrs old.. tapi aku rase dah 50+..

What is she trying to prove… dah mandi and ready nak tido?? Adoi, Ya Allah jauh kan lah perangai macam tu…hehehehe..Semoga menjadi peringatan untuk kita..

Sampai pagi ni my hubby dok asyik kata tak selera nak balik and tengok muka bibik tu.. cant wait for tomorrow when shes gone..Kah kah kah kah..

So, esok aku akan hantar dia lepas aku habis check-up. Angkut lah skali my niece and Layla. Dah tak larat nak tanggung sakit kepala..

Sesungguhnya Tuhan itu Maha Mengetahui apa yang terbaik untuk kita.. dan Sesungguhnya Dia Maha Pengasih & Penyayang..

Berikan lah aku petunjuk Ya Tuhan…

Hari ni hati gundah gulana kat office..memikirkan Adam and Layla kat umah ditinggalkan with temporary maid..Ya Tuhan berikan lah aku petunjuk..

Even dah ade temporary maid, tidak bersyukurkah aku?? Dulu berdoa dapat temporary maid cecepat, bila dah dapat…hati tak tenteram pulak dibuatnye..Ya Tuhan, banyak betul dugaan dariMu…

Temporary maid aku datang semalam. Ambil di Cheras umah agent dia. Seems that the agent sangat tidak sabar untuk me’let go’ of this lady from her custodian. When we ask her why suddenly ade maid available for temporary, the agent said that the maid baru je berenti kerja dari majikan chinese. She cannot tolerate with the majikan chinese e.g with food and susah nak solat..

First thing maid ni sampai kat rumah, aku suruh dia mandi and basuh baju. Maid-maid yang sebelum ni pandai diaorang buat semua tu bila sampai rumah aku, tapi yang ni kena bagi instruction. If not, dia buat muka selamba je dengan bau yang macam-macam dari badan dia tu..adoi pening makcik yang memang dah senang meloya sekarang ni..

Dengan reluctantnya dia mandi, then aku suruh basuh baju pulak..dgn suara yang kuat dia cakap kat aku..: Ini sudah dibasuh, tinggal disidai sebab ngak kering di rumah Mbak Sepia tadi..” maksud nye dia dah basuh baju kat rumah agent dia and tinggal nak sidai je..

Aku cakap lah baik-baik lagi..” Bibik, kan bibik dah masukkan baju-baju lembap tu dalam beg, berbau lah nanti kalau sidai kering pun. Baik lah basuh balik.. dia buat muka tak puas hati dia jalan depan aku and cari sabun and baldi..(dlm hati aku, amboi belum apa-apa lagi dah tunjuk keras kepala dia..)

Then, Adam balik sekolah. Aku mandikan and suruh bibik tu tengok macam mana aku buat..Adam tak nak dengan bibik ni, terus suruh aku tutup pintu shower..Alahai anak ku sorang ni..Bibik nie pulak bukan ade inisiatif nak pujuk ke ape, terus dia blah keluar and tengok baju-baju yang dia sidai tadi. Adam siap mandi dia tanya, “ Ibu, siapa tu? Itu lah bibik baru . dia akan tolong kita sampai bibik yang betul-betul datang… “Kenapa Adam nampak dia macam nenek je, cuma dia walk faster then nenek..” aku mmg dah tak boleh tahan nak ketawa..aku senyum je lah..” bibik ni dah tua sikit lah Adam.. “ tak tau nak explain ape kat Adam dah..hehehehe..

Then, aku bagi Adam makan lunch. Layla kat atas napping dalam bilik my niece..bibik ni datang tengok aku bagi Adam makan.  Then dia tanya, “Ibu, mana air sejuk?” aku cakap dlm peti sejuk. “Sekajap lagi saya mau minum”..” “Eh, tak puasa ke bibik?” Aku bertanya dengan pelik nya sebab tadi aku nampak dia susun sejadah dengan telekung kat bilik dia.. “Tadi, saya tak bangun sahur..” dah tua-tua ni pun tak tahan ke kalau puasa tak bersahur. Pelik betul aku..Suka hati kau lah kan..Aku diam je..Bila aku buat muka pelik sambil suapkan Adam..dia dengan nada tak puas hati cakap kat aku “ Yelah, yelah saya terus puasa lah..” then terus masuk bilik dia..Eh, sendiri nak naik angin pulak. Suka hati kau lah kan nak puasa ke nak minum air ke. Ape aku ade kesah… dari sini lah kesangsian, keraguan and kemusykilan aku datang…

Oleh sebab aku dah ragu-ragu dengan dia ni..aku memang tak bagi langsung dia involve dalam food preparation..biarlah aku terboyot-boyot ni buat sendiri..ishk..

Time buka puasa…ya Allah, makan macam orang kebulur..habis air tebu dia belasah, nasib baik ade lah tinggal segelas untuk Adam..even orang tak pelawa pun dia belasah jugak..ishk, ishk..orang macam ni pun ade..

Esok, time sahur aku nak test dia nie.. Berikan lah aku petunjuk Ya Tuhan…

Ramadhan ke dua..

Today, ade check up kat hospital. Placenta ade sikit calcification..but baby growth still ok..kaki, muka and tangan dah start bengkak-bengkak..gynae advise suruh monitor blood pressure. Dia takut early signs of pre eclampsia..banyak betul dugaan pregnancy with SLE nie..tapi ape pun yang berlaku, I need to be sangat bersyukur kepada Tuhan..Alhamdulillah ya Allah..semua ini ade hikmah nye…

Balik from hospital, aku purposely lalu kat sebelah Pejabat Imigration..nak tengok lah ‘kemeriahan’ proses pemutihan pendatang ni kan..

Memang ramai betul orang around that area..definately you can differentiate them from our Malaysian people kan, with their faces and they way they dress…

Public buses lalu lalang je kat tepi building tu..and to my surprise, none of them yang tahan these buses and board them..these illegal immigrant naik taxis..and ade jugak yang bawak kereta or motobikes sendiri – sibuk carik parking…wah, banyak nye duit diaorang nie!! Bole ade motor, kereta..jalan-jalan naik teksi.. kita malaysian, kena kira duit cukup ke tak nak commute pegi kerja naik public transport...such ironic..

Aku sebenarnya tak bole make up the rational of giving these people amnesty or pengampunan..kenapa tak terus hantar balik lepas amik biometrik nye?? So that lepas ni nak masuk lagi dgn menipu nama and passport yang lain dah tak bole.. first passport namanye rohani, second passport nama nye nurani, third passport namanye suraini..mungkin lah kan..heheheh. muka bole jadi kurus sikit, gemuk sikit, pakai tudung, tak pakai tudung..make up sikit..hehehe.. tapi cap jari nye same..

I think its about time we need to be strict with these people.. we should learn from neighbouring countries on how to tackle these immigrants problems..

sampai bila nak bagi muka..mungkin sebab tu lah pandai pijak kepala orang-orang kita…(mungkin ade sedikit emo disini sebab maid baru je lari..hehehehe)

Ramadhan Menjelma Lagi...

Syukur kepada Tuhan kerana memberi kesempatan kepada kami menjalani Ramadhan lagi..this will be our 6^th Ramadhan as a family. Alhamdulillah..

Banyak betul yang perlu disettlekan during this month…preparation for hari raya especially baju for Adam and Layla.. finalise kuih raya (even diri sendiri tak beraya, kena berpantang..huahuahua..)..and finalise plan tuk new baby and berpantang..

Not to forget – preparation sepanjang Ramadhan..plan berbuka puasa and bersahur..

Im just plain lucky sebab husband tak demand makan berat time bersahur..he will settle for a bowl of cereal, kurma and hot drink..my niece pulak tak cerewet during sahur, ape yang ade dia bedal aje lah.. or kalau terlambat bangun, minum air je lah..(selalunye most of the time dia tak bangun sahur..hehehe..)

Plan berbuka pose..nak kena stock up groceries for one week..nak kena plan masak ape for a week..itu lagi pening nak fikir..

Last night ade terfikir nak bukak buku resepi, nak cari idea nak masak ape..tapi rasenye it is more practical buat all those heavy cooking over the weekends..when time is not an issue…

Weekdays during bulan puasa, bole keluar office paling awal at 4.00pm. Smooth traffic will bring me home latest by 4.45pm. So simple dishes je lah yg sempat dimasak for juadah berbuka puasa..my niece akan pergi pasar ramadhan for kuihs or for other things that she fancy..thats basically the plan lah… Setiap tahun memang masak tuk berbuka puasa…I should be proud of myself for this..hehehehe..

this time around kena banyak minta tolong from my niece..to prep for the things untuk masak..thanks ye Haena..you really helps us ALOT!

Final weekends sebelum Ramadhan, I need to finalise new baby punye barang-barang..

Oh no, where did I put the list?! It was prepared a few weeks ago… macam tak percaya, anak dah nak masuk tiga orang pun, I still need to prepare a “newborn must have” list..

I’m sure mak-mak kita dulu don’t do this thing even anak lagi lah ramai…*hats off to our mothers*..

Dah siap semua barang, akan terus dimasukkan dalam beg hospital. In any case of emergency, senang! Still teringat time delivery Layla..datang hospital for normal and scheduled check-up, terus kena masuk ward..emergency Czer. It was during 35weeks of pregnancy..lucky dah kemas semua barang.. 

Selamat berpuasa to all Muslims. Semoga Ramadhan kali ini adalah lebih baik dari yang sebelumnye..

Parenting for Four Years Old

These past few days I have been reading alot. It has been months aku meninggalkan aktiviti ni (read for the kids tu ade lah)!. Maybe I was too engrossed with other activities..plan pindah rumah, fikir and coordinate reno rumah, office work, plan bersalin, mengemas rumah...and the list goes on and on..
without me realising the exertion and strain that building up inside me..

I read about parenting for four years old. I search the net endlessly for information..

These are random thoughts from my own experience :

First of all, Adam is attending pre school. I need to be aware that it takes A LOT of energy for him to hold it together, follow the rules and listen, not to mention sitting down and focusing. 
Most four year olds, according to traditional childhood developmental standards, have the “wiggles”, have short attention spans, and have more physical energy than they know what to do with.  Compare that description to what is going on at school, and plan for lots of outside time to blow off steam when they get home.
Thats explain why balik sekolah je,Adam will ask for a few rounds of bicycle ride, and after that nak siram pokok pulak (adoi, tgh2 panas anak ku sayang dgn tak bukak baju sekolah lagi..). nonetheless, we let him do it for a few minutes..susah jugak lah nak ajak masuk rumah..

"Adam, jom masuk rumah..petang nanti we can water the plants again.." No response..
"Adam, masuk rumah lah..its hot outsides..nanti demam.." "Adam dah minum water ibu" ..*adoi lah..*
"Adam, masuk lah, kesian adik main sorang-sorang.." No response..
"Adam, jom masuk, simpan your water spray, park your bicycle, mandi and have your lunch.."
" Can I have 3 more ibu.."
After a few minutes, still tak masuk rumah...
"Adam, if you are not coming in now, ibu tutup pintu.." "Yelah, yelah...*reluctantly*
How many words / persuations am I using to this angel? Most of the times, rase frustrated because im out of idea dah...and I had to threaten him..

A four-year-old doesn’t need a lecture or a speech or guilt.  Short explanations, possibly. 
Restitution for what they did – fixing it in some way- is so important. 
But not the lecture or guilt-trip.  They really cannot comprehend it the way we as an adult can!
Many four-year-olds in a stage of disequilibrium actually need less words, less choices, more warmth and more CALMNESS from us.

The inner work of our parenting skills at this time is several-fold. The key word is to stay calm.
Take a deep breath everytime these angels spilled a cup of water, get cranky all of sudden, want things to be his way..*this is also reminder to myself :)*

Having break for a few minutes without any kids is essential. You can reflect, recharge and reconnect yourself..*maybe tido is not a really good choice tho, tapi oklah..bole recharge our energy..hehehe..*

This will definately help me to be better mother...mungkin sekarang ni, this opportunity for me is limited only after the kids are in bed...sebab balik office nak kena siapkan household works, masak and at the same time attending to the kids..susah betul nak spend quality time with the kids without maid sekarang nie..*as energy pun dah berkurang during 3rd trimester*

I need to be easy on myself.  Parenting a four-year-old is a lot of work, working to structure and balance your daily activities..
Need to work toward less words, less explanation, more warmth to these angels..*more hugs and kisses for them*
Expalin on how to fix something.. rather than just talk about the anger, upset and tiredness that I'm feeling at that moment – whew, it is hard work! 

Be easy with yourself, stay clam, love yourself and your angels as you grow as a parent.

Maid ku lari..kaburrrr…

My maid run away last night..arrggghhhh..ya Tuhan..sabo aje lah…

We were home last night around 9.00pm after completing a heavy groceries round in Carrefour. I still can vividly remember how excited Adam and Layla when we parked our car at the garage. They were jumping up and down while lloking at us from our maid’s room.

Our maid – Ani, helped us carry all the plastic bags to the kitchen and asked on where to keep and how to arrange the stuffs..while the kids swamped my husbands with all their demands for the day. I coordinate Ani’s work and assist her on what I can..

I did realised that her handphone was non-stop ringging (with vibrate mode lah kan..) but she did not pick up the phone.

I was under the impression the she wanted to complete her tasks first and will return or attend the call later..(lagilah aku bersangka baik – it must be her family from kampung agak..)

She finished keeping all the groceries and only left to bersihkan ayam..aku buat susu for the kids because it was already 9.45pm, need to put the kids to bed..

She continuded to bersihkan ayam, “ Ibu, naiklah atas dulu, saya bole selesaikan kerja-kerja di bawah ni. Lantai pun saya dah mop tadi..”

Me and husband pun naiklah atas nak tidokan Adam and Layla..

Around 10.15pm, my husband turun bawah, as the kids dah tido and he wanted to wash all the milk bottles..he can’t find our maid anywhere inside the house (dlm her room pun takde) and the kitchen door was closed without been locked up. Ingatkan Ani pergi buang sampah, tengok kat luar pun takde..she already gone..

We realised that she had geledah our house (including our bedroom) to search for her passport. She found it and took it with her lah kan..tension nye waktu tu..Tuhan je lah yang tahu..her work permit (by JP Visa) jus approved last Monday..baru tiga hari..now dah lari pulak..

Husband immediately called up police and they arrived 15minutes later. We gave them her description, passport number and also her picture.

Me, selongkar her room. Turns out she leff a note saying minta maaf, tak sengaja buat macam ni..bla..bla..bla..

She only brought with her a shirt and a pants..memang nekad betul maid-maid indon ni..

Police petrol car was outside our house until 11.30pm and they still cannot locate her…pelik betul as malam-malam at my neighbourhood, if she was on her own..sure dah dapat tangkap dah..she must been picked up by someone..

It’s a gone case lah..malas nak fikir or nak carik ke apa lagi..wasting our precious energy je..

We are really lucky (syukur kepada Tuhan) that first, she waited for us to be home and handed the kids safely, she did not leave the kids and terus cabut lari while kitaorang takde kat rumah and secondly, she did not take anything from the house..

Maid..maid..dapat majikan layan baik..tak nak kerja..lari..

Dapat majikan yang layan teruk-teruk, tak pulak lari…

Lesson learnt :

1. Tak nak bagi maid ade handphone sendiri (my first maid dulu memang takde)
2. Nak simpan pasport maid kat office (kat rumah diaorg bole cari)
3. Nak keep away all my kids punye tabung..takut nanti duit hilang tanpa disedari..
4. Mungkin nak kena tambah ‘kegarangan’ sikit..hahaha..